Experience of a first time OFW

Gilbert Roque is a first-time overseas Filipino worker (OFW). He is 22 years old and single (but currently committed in a long distance relationship). When he was younger, he dreamed of becoming a big-time corporate executive with a big office that comes with a personal secretary, fancy cars, corporate meetings where his decisions are crucial, and big-time deals that spell big-time bucks. Through the years, he outgrew that dream - simply because it was unattainable. His family’s situation could not possibly give him the opportunity to pursue that dream. “And besides,” he said, “It’s just a dream.”

Gilbert is the older child of two siblings. His mother is currently working as a saleslady at a duty-free store in Bahrain. His father is, and this is his exact word, “somewhere,” and does not want to talk about it further. His sister, Aubrey, is currently in college, taking up nursing. She is now on her third year.

His girlfriend, Maria Abelina "Mherry" Nuguid, is 22 years old, and works as an administrative assistant at a company which supplies electrical materials here in the Philippines. She took up computer programming in college. Gilbert and Mherry first met when they were in college, as classmates. They became best friends. They had relationships that they talked about, asked advice about, and, share each others pains and disappointments. Never in their wildest dream did they expect that they would eventually click as a couple together.

Gilbert also took up computer programming in college. After he graduated, he worked as a sales executive in Makati for several months only. He quit the job after deciding to work in Dubai and also after much prodding from his mother. Thus, he became an OFW.

And now he shares his life and experiences as an OFW.

Q: How old were you when your mother left for Bahrain? Who took care of you and your sister? How did it affect as you were growing up?
A: I was seven years old when my mother left for Bahrain. She was also convinced by her mother to work abroad. When she left, we were taken cared of by our uncles and aunts. Growing up without her at that very early age was very difficult for us. There were times when I would wake up in the middle of the night and I would just want to hold her, but it was not possible because she was not there. I can never bring back the precious moments that my mother missed as much as I want to, and I’m pretty sure that she still grieves for it. But life is full of sacrifices. You either go for it or be left behind. She chose a path that comes with the pain of not being with her children for a long time, and I admire her for that, no matter how painful it was for me too.

Q: Was it hard for you to have an OFW for a parent?
A: Yes, but not because I despise her for it – but simply because she was not there as much as I would have wanted too. I know she worked so hard to provide a better future for us. I know also that if there was another way, she would have never left.

Q: For how long is your mother working as an OFW? How often does she go home here in the Philippines? How does that feel?
A: My mother has been an OFW for 15 years. She goes home to us every 2 years and stays for about a month or two. I feel that it is not enough, but what can I do. It is always so hard to say goodbye every 2 years, you never get used to that.

Q: During your early years in school, did it ever cross your mind that you would become an OFW someday? Did your choice of course in college have something to do with it, and your desire to finish your schooling?
A: I may have thought about it then. Because when you are surrounded by people who work overseas you tend to walk that path also. If I remember correctly, there was a time that computer related courses will get you a job abroad fast. So, yes I did choose computer programming, because I had plans of working abroad also.

Q: What was the turning point in your life that made you to decide to work as an OFW?
A: Like I said, I did think about working abroad early on. I was just not decided on it, until in recent years. But basically, what made me decide (aside from the prodding of my mother) to work abroad is actually for her, my mother. Although there are a lot of factors leading to the decision, it was always about her, and, my sister, and, of course my grandmother, and all the people in our household.

Q: How did you go about the processing of your application? Were you initially afraid, or were you confident because someone was helping you out?
A: Well, it was not actually difficult for me, only the waiting time. The agency that processed my application is owned by my ex-girlfriend’s sister. I prepared the usual required documents passports, birth certificate, clearances and etc. I also paid a placement fee in the amount of Twenty Thousand Pesos.

Q: So now, tell me about your experiences as a first-time OFW.
A: I left for Dubai in May 13, 2007, to work as a service crew at a fast-food restaurant. Upon arrival, we were picked up by a shuttle to bring us to our assigned flat. There were ten of us then. In the three days that we were in the flat, we were not allowed to go out. The only chance that we were allowed to go out is to have a medical check-up.

We started on our job after three days. I thought that they would somehow give us a few days to get used to the job. I was wrong, on our first day, we were treated as seasoned workers and expected to act as such. I was constantly making mistakes which immediately caused me reprimands from our supervisor. It was hard because you are in a different place with different laws and cultures. I was afraid that too many mistakes would somehow cause me harm. You get that feeling if you are miles away from home. Eventually, after a month of fearing for the worst, I got used to the job and was doing it mechanically.

Those first three days, for me, are the longest days of my life. When I awoke for the first time in a different country, it finally hit me that I was a long way from home.

Q: What are the advantages and disadvantages of being a first-time OFW?
A: Leaving the Philippines for the first time signifies that you will be out of your comfort zone. On the other hand, it also gives you an opportunity to see the world. It is very hard to leave your loved ones and friends who you are used to being with for the most part of your life. However, leaving also gives you a chance to meet new friends. It’s not like you’re leaving just because you want to, every OFW has one thing in mind, and that is to be able to provide a better future for those who were left behind. It is hard because there is truly no place in this world like home.

Q: In your own experience as a first-time OFW, what is, by far, the most challenging part?
A: Being an OFW feels somewhat like you are being thrown to your past and then thrown again in the future all at the same time. You absolutely miss home and all the things that you used to do while you were still there. But duty calls and suddenly reality kicks in to remind you what you came here for. People will not exactly pause for a moment to tell you that it will be alright. You have to go with the flow or else you will go insane, or worse, get fired.

Q: When the going gets rough, when you are plagued by homesickness, what helps keep you sane?
A: Simple. I just think of my family and friends and what we used to do. I just close my eyes and dream of home.

Q: Can you spot a fellow Pinoy?
A: There is this certain “Pinoyness” that is very distinct to every Filipino – and it has never failed me. It is the “Pinoy smile” - which is so genuine. Also, Filipinos tend to talk to each other like they are deaf people. It is actually funny and heartwarming.

Q: What did your mother share to you, about the lessons she learned while working as an OFW?
A: Hard work has its rewards. To put it simply, if you are good, you will definitely move ahead from the rest and you will be able to get whatever it is that you want.

Q: For how long do you intend to work as an OFW?
A: I honestly do not know. But one thing is for sure - I want to be able to provide a good future for my family. I want my mother to go home and not to worry about anything anymore. I want my future wife to feel secure not only in finances but with the thought that I would never leave her. I want my sister to finish her studies and not to worry that we may not be able afford it. I just want to be that person who can and will do anything to do just that.

Q: Do you think that OFW nowadays are getting younger and younger? What can you say about that? Do you think it’s a trend or a legacy passed on?
A: I know how it feels to be separated from a loved one. It is one of the reasons why I decided, now, to work abroad. It is better to be an OFW while you are still young, so that you will have ample time later to enjoy life.

I am a son of an OFW. My grandmother is also an OFW. I am now an OFW myself. So for me, I think it’s a legacy passed on.

You are invited to share your story with us.